Monday, October 17, 2016

Fear Fete

OH
MY
GOSH!!!

You guys.  Did you ever rip the posters out of Bop Magazine, Tiger Beat, Teen Beat, or The Big Bopper or anything? Well, I did.  And I collected them.  I traded them.  I hung up my favorites.  I rotated them out.  They were Serious Freaking Business.  If you ever did that, and especially if it was Serious Freaking Business... and if you ever get the chance to meet one of those boys... even if you're now a 35 year old woman... DO IT.  I can't caps lock that enough.  I should've italicized.  I should've bold faced!  You guys, you have got to take the opportunity if it presents itself.  I met Brandon Adams over the weekend, and even though I promised to play it cool, I freaked the eff out. 

Okay, so like, when you're eleven years old everyone you meet who is your age looks like garbage, basically.  It's a universally awkward stage, from about eleven to fourteen.  Oh, it doesn't last the whole time for everyone, and it's sometimes earlier, sometimes later... sometimes lifelong (just being funny).  But when you're that age and you see someone of the same age who seems impossibly beautiful it's a big deal.  And of course, I know as an adult that is impossibly beautiful, because in real life nobody gets that combination of great genes, great lighting, great stylists, great lenses and filters and great photoshopping in the sixth grade.

At any rate, my hormones were kicking in and my bedroom walls were filling up.  My favorites were -first and foremost, Matthew Lawrence; I still dig him- and then Brandon Adams, Mike Vitar, Jonathan Brandis, Kris Kross, NKOTB, Marques Houston, Macaulay Culkin... and I'm sure some others I don't remember. Point is, one of the ones I do remember, and very clearly, is Brandon Adams (swoon).  When I met him in person over the past two days he was the nicest guy! I seriously reverted back to twelve-year-old, spazzy, squealing Tina and he treated me like a normal person, which must have been a task in itself. And he signed my DVD cover "stay sweet, Cake Eater".  I legitimately got dizzy.  I tend to hyperventilate. *shrug*





After I was done spazzing out (I just realized I could've asked for a hug... what's wrong with me), I walked out of sight around a corner and just... sat.  I don't know how long I sat there staring at the floor but I had to process!  I realized that I'd never really considered those boys real people.  They were impossible people, but my life subtly shifted when I realized they exist.  I shook his hand.  The boy from the poster grew up, like I did, and I physically saw him and touched his hand.  It's surreal.  I mean, I've met celebrities before.  I spent a day hanging out with Jimmie Walker from Good Times once, and that was fun.  But I never had his poster on my wall!  The boys from the posters are a whole different deal.  If you get the chance, do it and please let me know how you felt.  If you've already done it, let me know if you felt the same way.  Plus, as you know, The Mighty Ducks 2 (yes, the sequel for some reason) is one of my ten favorite movies so that added to everything.

Oh, and will someone please, PLEASE explain to me why I kept apologetically repeating that I was a nerd?  Was there really any part of me that thought my awkward social skills, Star Trek dress and Dr Seuss, Star Trek AND Jackson 5 tattoos didn't say that loud and clear?  And why would I even need to apologize for that? Nerds are in right now!  Maybe not us socially awkward ones, but I'm close enough.  Uuuugh.  Whatever.

 Another thing: This is what my hair does in public...

And this is what it does at home at the end of the day

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